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When nothing in life is certain, other than death, and change is thrown upon us at times from all angles, why is it that we are so afraid of change? I know that in some parts of my life I have had many massive changes, some of my own making and some thrown at me by others.

Whilst I used to be like so many others and fear change, I now know that if it is something I have no control over, that the only way to tackle change is to embrace it and move forward with life.

Many people are afraid of change for a large number and variety of reasons. The first is that the brain perceives patterns in everyday life and becomes comfortable with them. If those patterns then change, it can be extremely disruptive to a person’s entire way of thinking, leading to stress and anxiety.Continue reading

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permission to sabotage

Thank you for being here. If you are reading this article, then you are almost certainly interested in improving yourself, of having a better life. It is great to want to improve yourself in order to improve your relationships, but you might discover that you meet with resistance at every turn from certain people in your life. What should you do if you discover someone you care about is sabotaging you, and putting obstacles in the way of you working towards a better self?

Firstly, you need to determine if the sabotage is deliberate or unconscious on their part. They might just be a control freak, but also they might not even realise what they are doing. For example, women often think that their other halves would love it if they slimmed down, or that their mother would be proud that they were getting healthier.

Instead, they are told, “You look fine just the way you are,” or “Go on, have a little. It’s your favourite.” This can be through habit, or it could be because the person sabotaging you is afraid of change. If you change for the better, what will happen to the relationship? They may feel insecure, for no valid reason.Continue reading